Thursday, February 17, 2011

Money IS Happiness

....when it comes to retail therapy anyway. I recently tweeted Shopping Therapy myth or actual remedy? 

Then I decided to do some research. 

Retail therapy is shopping with the primary purpose of improving the buyer's mood or disposition. Often seen in people during periods of depression or transition, it is normally a short-lived habit. Items purchased during periods of retail therapy are sometimes referred to as "comfort buys".

According to one study falling into self-centered thinking is one result that comes from sadness. (Let's call it the "Poor Me" mentality.) When someone feels sad they're often looking for a distraction or something to make them feel better.

Often times, we'll allow ourself something that we otherwise shouldn't have. (i.e. do you need another pair of shoes? do you really want to eat a 500 calorie dessert?) Maybe not, but Poor Me, will probably talk you into it for a mood lifter.

That being said, the effects of this are temporary, and if prolonged may lead to further stress and depression as a result of either debt or in the case of the 500 calorie dessert, unwanted weight gain.

Retail Therapy is real, but it's not much of a solution as it is a diversion.

So, maybe in the future use the golden rule of waiting 24 hours before you make a big purchase, especially if you make it when you're down in the dumps.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

We Can Work It Out

“Hey you know that--”
Yeah I washed it.”
“—no I was gonna say”
Ohhh yea I mailed it”

First, interrupting someone is extremely rude, it means you believe that what you have to say is more important than what they have to say. Next, one of the most annoying things a person can do is ASSUME they know what you’re going to say. It’s wonderful that you feel you know your partner/spouse that well, but a lot of times its more of an aggravation than a convenience.

::Walks in the front door:: “I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU CALLED YOUR MOTHER??! CAUSE SHE JUST CALLED (blah blah blah)

No one likes to be lectured or nagged, but even less appealing is being bothered after a long day.

Many times when couples are facing difficulty in their relationships, it’s a matter of ‘he said, she said’ or miscommunication. (Unless of course you’re just not right for each other, in which case this article is not for you)

It’s not always easy to express ourselves, and it’s even trickier when it’s done under duress (i.e. a fight). Below is a list that, when utilized, may help to facilitate communication in your relationship.

  1. Work at it
  2. Learn to compromise
  3. Seek to understand
  4. Affirm your spouse’s worth, dignity, and value
  5. Be positive and encouraging
  6. Practice confidentiality
  7. Wait for the right time
  8. Share your feelings
  9. Avoid mind readings
  10. Give a response
  11. Be honest
It's easy to get caught up in the heat of the moment, but try to take a step back and implement these, see if it won't help to resolve or even deter some disagreements.